Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Mental Madness

I should have known it was only a matter of time. I wonder if it is the change of seasons or what but summer seems to raise the bar on crazy behavior. I probably shouldn't say crazy, not politically correct and everything. I certainly don't want to hurt anyone's feelings either but since I feel pretty crazy myself right now I and too bone tired to even try to care that much. I think the caregivers of those who have a mood disorder of whatever flavor sometimes just feel numb about it all. So, that said, what are the current mental issues of the month?

Sean: Picking. He is trying to test my boundaries again to see what he can get away with. Insults and insinuations. Making comments reminding me of how poor I am and how well off he is, how much smarter he is because he has a degree now and I don't, implying I am a bad mother and not up to the challenge of handling our children's education, etcetera, etcetera. Memory Loss, whole conversations apparently never happened. Forgetting to bathe our daughter, what clothes belong to her and even her correct age. This stuff with him happens in waves. A month or two of crazy behavior then a month or two of stable if jackassery behavior. You really have to look to tell them apart. I can tell by looking at him when he is in a bad cycle. It helps.
All of this bothers me less than...

Connor: We finally had the doctor's visit we have been anxious for for several weeks. I was really getting worried when he complained of chronic back pain and exhaustion as well as wanting to smack his head into the wall. The final diagnosis for him is ADHD with underlying symptoms of depression and anxiety. I won't bother to go into all the gory details but one good thing was that Connor was completely honest with the doctor. At least I knew he was serious about getting some real help even though one thing he said upset me. I think more than that I thought he had told me everything already and some of it was bad enough. Not to mention Sean was breathing down our necks about it but Connor was adamant his dad was out of the picture for the treatment. He was afraid his dad would try and block it again knowing this appointment would most likely mean medication. In the end we got the diagnosis and Connor is now taking some medication. A two week trial with a follow up appointment. I am to check Connor's blood pressure to be on the safe side and monitor any changes. The doctor who saw him recommended a therapist (PHD) while we were there so we would have therapy in conjunction with meds management. I was thrilled when I saw who he recommended. It was my old therapist who I had to stop seeing because he left the area a few years ago. He was the best guy I had ever had and I cried when he left. Apparently he is back in the city and I am even now waiting for a call back for him to see Connor. I feel confident he will be a good fit for Connor, even better than for myself. I am optimistic but it is tiring to have to go through this all again. Connor did crash though after having such a great school year. He still was supposed to go to summer school to catch up on some things he had missed during periods of his down time. He missed the last week of school and the summer school because of this. This week we have to call his school counselor with the latest diagnoses and figure out how we can get him caught up. Most likely with some kind of tutor. Good thing I am going to be having a full time job soon. Not good that I won't be able to take a day off for at least 2 months maybe more. After July 31st Connor with have to go to appointments alone. I can do a skype meeting with the therapist to check in or call. The whole month of August I won't even a lunch break. My lunch break will be me at my library job. Anyway, we do the meds or two weeks and see if things improve. Hopefully if the issues are just ADHD the therapy and meds will alleviate the depression and anxiety. If not then we go from there.

Something to look forward to.

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