Our Island Family Life: March 2011

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Crowded House

1 comments Posted by perphila at 10:05 AM

I spent the whole of yesterday afternoon in town dealing with my car. At one point I felt like crying. I had it jumped and went to go get gas just to make sure that wasn't the issue. I needed it to run at least half an hour so I decided to get it washed and fill my tire. I didn't want to run around on a low tire or just sit there. Well, the automatic machine for the car wash stole $10 from me. I went though anyway and grumbled knowing I would now have to go inside and talk to the clerk. My time wasn't up from running the battery yet so I decided to get air before I went in. The machine only took quarters. I keep coins in my car ashtray for times like these and parking meters but when I looked there was only nickels and dimes. Mildly annoyed I checked my wallet and saw Will and Connor had cleaned me out for bus money. Well, crap. I waited since I didn't want to go inside with the motor running. After half an hour I turned the car off and tried to start it like I was told. Zip. Nothing. I had to call AAA....again....in one day. I called and saw Cade's phone was almost out of minutes. There was maybe $1 worth left. I tried not to panic. I saw a pay phone. It said it took nickels and dimes but in reality it didn't so I had to use the cell and hope for the best. After being told I would have to wait 45 minutes. Again. I went inside and got a drink and a candy bar. It was 2:30 and I hadn't eaten since 8am. I told the clerk about the car wash and was given a number to call since they didn't own the darn thing. Fine. I got some quarters which I realized I should have just used for the pay phone and went to get air. I blamed my absentmindedness on panic and stress. AAA took 20 minutes longer than they told me, I was glared at by three people who wanted to use the air machine. Thank goodness I went there first and not the pumps for gas. No sympathy at all. In the end I didn't leave the gas station until 4:45 and just made the boat. On the upside the real problem was just the car battery. I have gas, no electrical problem, no starter problem and the alternator is good. A dead battery I can handle. They replaced it right there. I still had to fork over $120 but at least I had the money, I didn't need a tow, I don't have to spend the hundreds of dollars I was dreading and I have my car back to drive next week. I have to drive to the training place for the post office Monday and Tuesday so I was giddy with happiness. I wanted to sit there and start the car over and over again just to test the reality of it. Will called in the middle of the whole battery fiasco and asked to have friends over. I wasn't really paying much attention and agreed, not comprehending how many friends he meant, then the phone died. I knew Cade had a friend over. No problem. Connor also had a friend over. Ok. Will brought three. Six teenagers and two middle schoolers. All but Cade taller than me. Did I mention they eat a lot? Thank God for pasta. Everyone was well behaved though and they did all the dishes and cooking and even made cake. One of the friends was visiting from college. Times are moving fast.

On the bizarre side of the coin, I dropped Sofie off Friday to visit Sean. We took the 4pm ferry which gets in around 5:20 and Sean picks her up at 5:30. He has never once been on time. Sometimes I fear I will miss the 5:45 ferry home but he always seems to make by the skin of his teeth. Will and Connor were in town and were going to take the 5:45 ferry home with me. They knew Sean was coming and they usually go outside to not run into him around 5:15. When Sofie and I got there imagine my shock to see Sean there at 5:20 and talking to Connor. Will was even there. Sofie ran inside and went to Will instead of Sean and cried. She missed him and didn't want to go etc. etc. Sean didn't look pleased. Will hugged her and told her he missed her too, then gave her a treat. She thanked him but was still sniffing. She told Sean she didn't want to go. He bribed her with pizza but she said she didn't want to eat it. While she said good bye to me Sean turned to Will and said, "Hi Will, how are you doing?" Will completely ignored him. Then Sean and Sofie left. I looked at Will but before I could say anything his friend (who is one of the ones visiting) said, "Wow Will, that was cold." Then he laughed. Will said to me," He has been here about 15 minutes and he walked right past me, never looked at me and didn't once try and speak to me until you stood beside me. I'm not going to be used like that." His friends nodded and agreed what he did was certainly cold but well deserved. Connor even agreed. He was pissed how his dad had ignored Will and spoke only to him but he was also mad about a few things his dad had said to him. He asked about school and said he had heard Connor would be going to the school his wife teaches at next year. Connor snorted apparently and said, "No. Like hell I would. Who told you that?" Sean said it was a teacher at Connor's school. His crew leader. The one Connor has been having issues with all along and has been feeding info to Sean's wife because they are friends. The one Will despises. Connor told Sean the guy was nothing more than a liar. After that the conversation lagged. I wonder if the teacher really said that or if Sean is the liar? Sean suggested they go see a movie sometime. Connor shrugged. Sean had walked right past Connor too the first time and even left the bay lines entirely when he saw Sofie and I weren't there. Connor said he spoke back to his dad because he didn't want to be rude but Will wasn't the only one Sean ignored. Connor said he might not even bother if there is a next time. *sigh*

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Blanky

0 comments Posted by perphila at 12:05 PM

So, Sofie decided she was having a blanky baby last night. She said it would take 32 days until it would be born, then said 6 days which finally ended at 23. Wild gestation period apparently. She said it was a girl and she would be naming her blanky Elizabeth. In the end it only took half and hour after which she wiped her greasy from dinner hands on it and threw in the washer for a bath. Ahhh, motherhood.

I am a feeling a little green eyed I guess. Sean is about to buy a huge six bedroom house. It makes me mad for several reasons. He never once tried to buy a house for our family even when we could afford it. He is still behind in child support so shouldn't that be a first priority? Why does he need that much space? Are they going to have more kids? It isn't like his two eldest children will ever be there and it won't be long before it will be three who don't visit. How in the heck can he afford it? Besides being behind with DHHS he still doesn't have a job and they don't make more now than when the "wife" was living in a tiny two bedroom condo. They have instead a new van, still making payments on his car, had a baby and are swimming in debt from college loans. Seems stupid to me..especially when they will have to also pay out of district fees for her daughter to attend school.

Speaking of the little biter. Cade was furious last weekend when he discovered how much of a thief she was becoming and the fact she had no consequences for it while he had his head nearly ripped off in the past for the "idea" he had stolen money. He found she had four student id cards from high school students from her mother's school, seven Boarders cards, a card from a local music store that wasn't hers and $50 stashed away. Now he is simmering thinking he had been screamed at all those times and it was probably her fault. He has no proof but that is where his mind is at. I didn't ask him if he talked to his dad about all that money she had or anything. I am going no where near that can of worms. I doubt Cade ratted her out. When they find out (if they don't already know) it will be interesting to see the results.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Upswing

0 comments Posted by perphila at 9:24 AM

I sometimes wonder how it is I have managed not to sink deep into the depths of depression myself. My stress level is functioning at an all time high. Not a high and then a leveling out but at a constant high. That said, I take good things when they happen with a sense of relief followed by a, "Hey, let's not get cocky now.." attitude.

The first miracle this week was when Sean actually got off the boat with the kids and personally handed me a check. I think the only reason he got off the boat was to hand me the check and not for the kids sake but take what you can get. I was really becoming depressed with the idea that he wasn't going to pay what was ordered by the court since it is his pattern of behavior. I was very glad to get it but I didn't act like it. I said a simple thank you and left it at that. Let's hope it doesn't bounce. Cade and Sofie whined and complained the whole walk home and at bedtime about their weekend but I was able to keep a calm center and hummed noncommittally. I was a little upset when I heard Sofie was punched by the 8 year old girl over there but Cade said he, "took care of it", I didn't ask what that meant.

I got my taxes done and I will finally be getting money back that my hyper manic bipolar ex husband can't steal....very nice. So even though I am going to be tight for the next few days I should be getting some relief soon. Also, the summer people have begun to filter back which means more jobs for me. I also should be starting my post office job soon so I have some financial hopes for the future.

Connor's mood has improved greatly. He wants to go back to school. He isn't upset with me or the work we have been doing here he just feels that, "he is ready" to go back and work hard. Maybe it's the change in season. I don't know. He has an appointment Wednesday with his therapist and if we are lucky he will be back in school on Monday of next week. He sleep schedule is good. He is walking his sister to and from school. Exercising more. He is more social. I am watching for anything hyper manic but so far he seems fine. I am scared to be hopeful.

No one is sick!

My school seems to have fixed their site so I am not missing anything finally.

I can get the car fixed now I have some money.

I can pay off all of my little bills and get the car registered.

I can get one nice present for Sofie for her birthday next month. I can't believe she will be 5. She thinks the whole month of April is her birthday...so funny.

I like this.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Innocent Eyes

2 comments Posted by perphila at 12:04 PM

The other day I was shopping at the grocery store with Sofie. We were in the check out lane and she tugged me and said, "Mumma! There is a beautiful lady over there." I looked around but I didn't know who she was referring to. I asked her where she was. Sofie told me, "The lady with the rainbow hair. She's going to have a baby!" I looked over and a few isles down was a very young pregnant woman. I would say she was in her late teens, early 20's and she did indeed have rainbow colored hair. Hence the picture I posted just to give a little example of what her hair was like. Not the actual person of course. Our eyes met and the girl smiled at Sofie obviously hearing the whole thing since Sofie wasn't quiet in the least bit. I smiled back. I am sure Sofie made her day because Sofie waved and said, "Hi beautiful baby lady!" I can imagine how some people would probably look down on such a young girl, pregnant and with an obvious style of her own. People seem to do that don't they?Seriously judge. I guess Sofie did too but in a very nice way. Through innocent eyes.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Where have I been?

1 comments Posted by perphila at 5:49 PM

Here. Fretting.

My school site has had issues since redoing their site and so my grade are low because I wasn't able to even log in for days at a time. It will be taken care of but still....

Connor is the same....."unhappy". Having a hard time getting in to see the pdoc.

My car in town is dead. I will have to wait until I get my taxes back to fix it, although a friend is going to have a look at it on Tuesday. I have to beg for rides or borrow until then. Rides on Fridays to swim class and next week Connor has a session and Cade has a conference. He missed high honors because of gym. How lame is that?

I have to see Sean tomorrow to drop off the kids....that stinks.

Honestly thee is so much going wrong from the large to the small I feel my heart aching all the time....literally. At least no one is sick for a change. I cleaned my house to get a feeling of control in my life. I want to go to bed but I have a class at 10pm tonight.

I made green pancakes to celebrate the holiday today. There was a potluck at the hall but I had a class at the same time it was going on and missed it. Will was in town and Cade had a bad day and was upset so he didn't go. Connor went but I didn't want to send Sofie with him. So, the rest of us had pancakes after my class was done. I really wish I could have gone.

No word on my orientation day. I finally got paid for babysitting. I have people hunting down the number to the loggers so I can get paid. When I mentioned they had stiffed me two weeks pay it didn't sit well. I hope someone chews them out. I am too much like a shivering chihuahua right now to do it myself. I am pretty confident Sean is also going to stiff me. April first is beginning to loom and I haven't heard anything. I feel great to have gotten some money this month for working. Not enough but I did pick up two more jobs for next month. Look for the positive.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Isn't this boring?

0 comments Posted by perphila at 10:24 AM

Whatever it is that is making me feel crappy seems to be getting better. I was really out of it yesterday. I slept well the night before (mostly due to nighttime cold medicine) but that same medicine made me sleepy all day. I didn't do very much but I realized my new classes started and I was freaking a little because I thought I had the week off. So I was a day behind. I had two classes yesterday so I spent most of the day in bed with my laptop. Not a bad deal huh? I did housework and took care of the kids of course, Will is sick, but the rest of the time I did my homework and rested and drank plenty of fluids. A lot of green tea. Still, I was coughing up crud all day. Is this a sign I am getting better? At this point, who the heck knows. I think I have some kind of immune problem. This winter has been horrible. I eat my veggies and fruits, take my vitamins, ride Will's exercise bike when I can't take my walk, load up on antioxidant stuff and keep the house as dust free and clean as possible so..what the heck? I know I have germ factories called children living with me but come on..I am getting real tired of this. I do have a lot of stress though....

I got a call today from my new boss...(hee hee) saying my orientation day has been set back to the 28th. I can't be on the rolls until the employee I am replacing if officially gone. After that I will get my paid training and start working. I will have to inform DHHS. I hate doing the right thing...still, has to be done.

Speaking of DHHS, still no word about them collecting anything. I think they send me mail to raise my hopes. *sigh* At the very least I know they are making his life miserable. I'll take what I can get. I am still waiting for the rest of the court ordered money from him. Frankly, if I don't have it by now I doubt I will.

Paid bills today. I want to cry.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Well, give me a break

1 comments Posted by perphila at 3:23 PM

Things went well on the interview today. I will have to take a drug test *snort* and then I will have my orientation on the 14th. My first official day will be on the 26th. I surely hope there will be some training between the 14th and the 26th. I am supposed to get 20 hours of that. All paid. *whoot!* It's not much, four hours a week minimum. After that I will have to be as flexible as possible to fill in for sick days, training or vacations. She hinted she might take a week this summer. She will retire in four years and so...who knows? I plan on going on for a masters in school so I might still be doing that in four years. So, riding high on getting the job something has to wrong right? Just to even the karma. My car in town won't start. I have no idea why. I hope it isn't electrical. There was some charge because the radio turned on. I didn't call for help and just came home. I will bring my jumper in town and try that. If that doesn't work I guess I will have to have it towed. I think I will get AAA this week. The island car wouldn't start either. I thought it was just because I was out of gas. I got it filled today (I had some brought to the house) then tried it. No go. I jumped it. Worked fine. Turned it off to make sure it would start. Nothing. So I will have to jump it every time I start it. This happened to the last car I had. I will call around and see if anyone has a overnight charger. That might be the problem. The battery it rather new. So darn annoying.

I was able yet again to pay for the parking by the skin of my teeth. I got a call in to a friend to double check our taxes (she pays me for babysitting and we always check our records with each other) so I should be able to get that done soon. I am hoping a miracle will happen and Sean will pay the rest of the money he owes this month. I do know I will be getting some child support on the third. I will feel better when I can pay off some bills. The job is a great thing. I also got someone on the loggers so I can get that money. They are officially gone and they let without paying me. I am glad I didn't go and clean last weekend. Always make the people pay first! :)