Monday, October 10, 2011
Sofie at Matinicus Island field trip
I find it is rather a good thing work slows down for me this time of year. I have to keep a closer eye on Connor and his moods and it is just so stressful I don't think I could handle anything more. My store job is only one day a week now. The post office job is one sometimes two days a week. My babysitting is spotty at best and the cleaning jobs will be pretty much over after this week. Scary but at least I have something. I am pushing that work/money stress aside and dealing with kids stress now.
As for my own school that is finishing up this week and I am going to take a break from that as well. I am burnt out. I will go back after a semester break. I wanted to cry dealing with this last class. It wasn't hard to figure out but a lot of work and it felt so meaningless. Besides, all the school stuff I want to deal with for the time being is the kids school stuff.
Connor has had trouble again getting to school but me and our support group of counselors and teachers stopped the ball before it got out of control this time and he is back on track. His grades are good but I can see an oncoming obsession with money happening with him again. He gets consumed with one obsession after another and it drives me crazy. Now he want to a job and it's his main focus. In other kids, wanting a job to earn your own money would be a good and responsible thing to do. In Connor it's the start of a guilt trip. He wants money usually because he feel like he owes a lot already and feels guilty. He also never got over the fact he got let go of his lobster job earlier than expected. He had spent his money thinking he would be able to make another $400 or so to tide him over but then he didn't get the work. I warned him that this could happen but who am I, right? I have offered him a few bucks working with me on some cleaning jobs but he always bails at the last minute. I don't offer any more. Will asked him to haul for him this past Saturday so he could go to one of his life breath classes and Connor hemmed and hawed until it was too late. He said no then yes but Will told him he had to know earlier than when Connor told him. I also don't think Connor can handle school and a job at the same time. Especially this time of year. I just feel like everything is holding on by a thread with him.
I was lucky enough to have Sofie for the extra day off here over the holiday. It was a dad weekend but he brought her back early. Not a big shock there. Cade is still not going and I am not sure how this will all play out.
Gotta run, I am going to work on figuring out ebooks and audiobooks for our library computers and how to link the system with the main branch. I should get paid more for this. *sigh*
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