Our Island Family Life: Floundering

- Discussing my pregnancy with Cade, "You were pregnant 9 months? It takes that long?"

- "The Beatles were British?"
- "People can die from cancer?"
- After a fight with Will, "I really want to dump my drink on you! No, wait, then you would dump me on you. Wait, that's not right. What did I say?"
- After getting a cup of hot chai, "Is this hot?" Will, "No, it's from the arctic." Cade, "No! I mean is this from a machine?"

- Will reads a quote from a paper, "Wise people think all that they say and fools say all that they think." Cade,"That's mean. Is that Libra?"

Monday, April 18, 2011

Floundering

Posted by perphila at 8:11 AM

Kids are gone so I should be throwing a party or something. Instead I am cleaning. I have been ignoring other things to do it so I know something is going on somewhere in my head but I am not sure what. Am I worried, overwhelmed, upset? I don't know. Usually when I clean I feel a sense of control and accomplishment. Instead, all I am seeing if how much more I have to do. Which makes me feel bad, which then makes me crawl under the covers to do school work. Of course then I feel like I have to much of that to do and stick it out for a while to slip away from that to the next task. Then the circle goes round and round. I should be over at the library today but I am not sure I will make it. It isn't like I have to be there. I need to clean it up and get it ready to open soon but going today isn't vital. I should finish up my assignments instead but I am torn and tired. I'll probably wind up folding laundry. I am having problems with priorities so maybe that's why even though I might work hard, I feel that lack of accomplishment. I like the me who is happy for small achievements. *sigh*

I feel like the kids should be here. I can't imagine how Cade is faring at his father's right now. Sofie will simply cry and fume but Cade....? I think I will shove that from my mind. There is nothing I can do about it in any case right now. *sigh*

I really need a new desktop. I have two but they are both old. I spent a good part of the day yesterday cleaning them up (on the inside) and they were SO slow. Everything I own is old or hanging on by a thread. Since all the kids (and me) use them for school it's pretty vital to keep them running well. I need to get them networked as well but I don't see it happening any time soon. More worries.

I had better eat something. Without the kids around I have less incentive to cook anything. I did yesterday to get stuff out of the fridge so Connor was happy but he's crazy if he thinks I am doing it today. Leftovers. Enjoy.