Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
I never did say how craft day went did I? Well, it was fun. Sofie was great, behaved and did all the crafts. She made a necklace and threaded the beads all by herself. It was a craft of one the teachers did and she was impressed at Sofie's hand eye coordination. The boy I babysit was there. It is so interesting to see how different he is when he isn't here. When he is here is listens, shares, takes a nap without a fuss and is rather quiet. I mean he is loud in the sense he is always making noise. Car noises and humming or taking but not yelling or screaming, that kind of thing. Well, he was running and loud and trying to touch everything. He tried to take other peoples crafts. His dad was working on a car craft (his mom was working) so I got up and took the crafts he took back from him and put them back on the table. He was not pleased but when he saw it was me taking them he tried to run away. I picked him up and got him working on another craft. I had to redirect him quite a few times and he tried to wiggle away a few times. Ack. So, when he was running and crazy Sofie wanted to do it too. I made her sit. I'm just glad she didn't get too upset since it was her nap time. Otherwise, a good time was had by all.
Connor came home from school and said he went and asked to talk to the school social worker. I am glad he did it on his own. I was going to call her today myself to ask her to talk to him. Now I just have to make a follow up call. He said he told her about what was going on. She asked him why he was missing days and he told her, "I don't know that's why I am talking to you." Nice huh? Well, it could be worse and has been. He is struggling and trying and that is more than he did last year. I don't think he understands or sees the patterns in his behavior. If his therapy doesn't go well he may need meds. Seeing as how it seems to be seasonal. Maybe he needs light therapy or we should be looking at SAD. Lots of possibilities. There are a lot of things I could do for him. Not in the good way either. I want to help him but not do his work for him. If there is anything I learned from Sean and his bipolar and depression is that Connor has to help himself. I need to be a support. I need for him to know I am here and love him and will do what I can but I can't live his life for him. It hurts me, but right now even though things are not that great I am optimistic. What really bothers me is what could happen if his dad tries to get involved. The last time he tried to "help" I had to wait two months before Connor could get his pdoc consult. They tend not to want to see people when the parents threaten to sue them. Good thing they are used to seeing that type of behavior. It was pure dumb luck that Connor was able to pull out of it on his own. It would have been nice if it hadn't taken almost 5 months. I am sure if I had been able to get him help when I tried to instead of later because of his dad the time it took would have been shorter. I wonder if the pdoc could have seen Connor when he was really bad if what he is going through now could have been prevented? Since his dad is in denial of his own mental health issues and from the last I knew still not taking his meds his involvement is problematic. His concern is haphazard at best. Not good when consistency is what Connor needs right now. Today I had to get Connor to eat. He just "wasn't hungry". I impressed upon him how his mood would improve with some protein in him. Not to mention give him some healthy energy and help his headache go away. He thinks I am too pushy and worrying for nothing. That just makes me frustrated. He has a headache and then does nothing to make himself better? No food, fluid or Tylenol? Nothing? Well, I got him full of that stuff and we had another little talk. I kept it short. I don't want to do the lectures. It doesn't help and he tunes out anyway. Short, sweet and show some concern seems to work better and gets him to do what I ask without much fuss. I hate how clinical that sounds and not like real sincere concern but I have to do what works. How can I even get ahead in other things like working and thinking about what I need to do for my own life when this stuff keeps popping up? One step at a time. Amazingly I am not really stressed out about that stuff today. I don't know why but I'm going to go with that...:)
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
As I am writing this, I am sitting in bed with the laptop on my knees. Sofie is behind me on the pillows and brushing my hair out. It is kind of painful. She is trying to be careful though. We have a Disney movie on so it's nice and quiet really.
Today is the craft day when we help the kids make presents for friends and family. I really don't want to go. I will though because I need to motivate myself. I am doing something extremely simple. It isn't really a craft. Years ago when the older boys were little my mom gave the kids a little snack sized baggie that had dry oatmeal and glitter in it. There was a note inside that said it was for Santa's reindeer. So every xmas eve the kids would spread it on the lawn. It would be magically refilled every year and to this day even the older boys go out every xmas and "feed" the deer. It is a cute tradition now. So, I got the stuff to make some and printed out the note and we are going to make them for our craft. It may not be much but it cost me $2 to make 20 of them and it means a lot to Cade. There will be the story to go along with it and hopefully the kids will get the whole family togetherness thing. Since today is a half day we are doing it in the afternoon so the kids here don't really miss school. The older boys don't go in on the boat on half days because they spend more time on the boat than in school. Connor is here and is going to help. Will went to school because he has some xmas shopping to do and he is going to use his gift card he got at the party. The restaurant is open from 11am to 2pm then closes and reopens again at 5pm. The later time is not good because of the boat schedule but the earlier time is perfect for the half day schedule.
I have a nasty tummy ache today. I am hoping it will go away by the time we have to be at the hall at 1pm. Otherwise I will really be using Connor to help with Sofie. Do NOT want to do that.
Work. Well, I found out the reason I didn't get to work Monday and Tuesday was because the mom and her son I babysit for were stuck in another state. She has three other kids from a previous marriage and they were here for the party. She was driving them back to their dad. He lives in Massachusetts and we live in Maine. Personally I don't know why he had to move so far away but, there you go. Anyway, her car died in New Hampshire and there she was stuck with four kids. I would have just cried. The car is still there. $1400 worth of repair needed. It always happens at the holidays doesn't it? I had hoped to work today but since it would have been a half day anyway we are just going to wait until tomorrow. She has catching up to do too. We are trying to plan the same day off for shopping. I need to do it and so does she that way I can be here for her and I can earn some money. Crazy scheduling.
I am not a the glass is half full or a half empty person anymore. Instead I am thrilled there is even water, unless it's poisoned.
;;
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