Our Island Family Life

Connor came home from school and said he went and asked to talk to the school social worker. I am glad he did it on his own. I was going to call her today myself to ask her to talk to him. Now I just have to make a follow up call. He said he told her about what was going on. She asked him why he was missing days and he told her, "I don't know that's why I am talking to you." Nice huh? Well, it could be worse and has been. He is struggling and trying and that is more than he did last year. I don't think he understands or sees the patterns in his behavior. If his therapy doesn't go well he may need meds. Seeing as how it seems to be seasonal. Maybe he needs light therapy or we should be looking at SAD. Lots of possibilities. There are a lot of things I could do for him. Not in the good way either. I want to help him but not do his work for him. If there is anything I learned from Sean and his bipolar and depression is that Connor has to help himself. I need to be a support. I need for him to know I am here and love him and will do what I can but I can't live his life for him. It hurts me, but right now even though things are not that great I am optimistic. What really bothers me is what could happen if his dad tries to get involved. The last time he tried to "help" I had to wait two months before Connor could get his pdoc consult. They tend not to want to see people when the parents threaten to sue them. Good thing they are used to seeing that type of behavior. It was pure dumb luck that Connor was able to pull out of it on his own. It would have been nice if it hadn't taken almost 5 months. I am sure if I had been able to get him help when I tried to instead of later because of his dad the time it took would have been shorter. I wonder if the pdoc could have seen Connor when he was really bad if what he is going through now could have been prevented? Since his dad is in denial of his own mental health issues and from the last I knew still not taking his meds his involvement is problematic. His concern is haphazard at best. Not good when consistency is what Connor needs right now. Today I had to get Connor to eat. He just "wasn't hungry". I impressed upon him how his mood would improve with some protein in him. Not to mention give him some healthy energy and help his headache go away. He thinks I am too pushy and worrying for nothing. That just makes me frustrated. He has a headache and then does nothing to make himself better? No food, fluid or Tylenol? Nothing? Well, I got him full of that stuff and we had another little talk. I kept it short. I don't want to do the lectures. It doesn't help and he tunes out anyway. Short, sweet and show some concern seems to work better and gets him to do what I ask without much fuss. I hate how clinical that sounds and not like real sincere concern but I have to do what works. How can I even get ahead in other things like working and thinking about what I need to do for my own life when this stuff keeps popping up? One step at a time. Amazingly I am not really stressed out about that stuff today. I don't know why but I'm going to go with that...:)