Our Island Family Life

I got an email yesterday from Sean asking me if I got a call from the co-parenting counselor about a session scheduled for today. I hadn't gotten one and I didn't get any messages. I told him that and that I wouldn't be able to go since Sofie was sick but that I was available next week and told him the day and time that was good for me. He said he couldn't do that time and if we could do it earlier. I replied I already had an earlier appointment during the time I knew he would be available. If I switched some stuff around I could do before noon on that day. He didn't reply. So I will call the counselor myself later today. I don't even really know for sure if a session was really scheduled. Unless I hear it from her I won't believe it.

During the email exchange I had reminded Sean about the kids dental appointments in two weeks and that I had reminded Connor several times but was certain he failed to tell Sean. I informed Sean I would be picking both Connor and Will from school that day and if Connor failed to show up I was holding Connor responsible to pay the $45 no show fee. Sean asked if the was a regular check up and I told him it was, it had been scheduled for 6 months and I had told both him and Connor about it by email and verbally several times. No response about that. I then asked him if he had gotten the paperwork for school conferences for Connor since they were supposed to be done by that day. Sean said he had and that he was waiting for a call from Connor's crew teacher. I had Will's conference scheduled for weeks now. That evening I got a call from Connor's crew leader and we scheduled a conference for the same day as Will's just a different time. I doubt Sean called the teacher or is being proactive considering how bad Connor is doing. I will see if I can talk to the school counselor while I am there. If Sean isn't keeping Connor in his regular therapy then he will need to be checked on by someone at least.

Connor's tales are getting hard to keep track of. This is the latest example. Yesterday Will was looking for his collectible playing cards and noticed a huge box was missing. He asked me if I had seen them. I hadn't. He was worried Cade might have taken them to school without permission. I told him I didn't think so. He gathered all the cards he could find that belonged to everyone and began to organize them hoping to see if any from the box got mixed in. He said to me he had heard from Cade Connor had recently come into a bunch of cards. I said yes, Connor had told me at the bay lines that a friend had given him thousands of cards and Connor was going to sell them for money because he didn't have any and he didn't play the game anyway. Will nodded and said he had heard me talking about it with Cade and that he had asked Connor about it before knowing his box was missing thinking he might be able to buy some off of him but Connor told him he didn't have any cards. Cade then said Connor did have the cards because he saw them last weekend and that Connor decided to get back into the game was wasn't going to sell the cards. Will narrowed his eyes and asked Cade how the cards were stored. Cade admitted he didn't know but Connor told him his friend had given them to him in a big plastic bag. Will said nothing but he said he was considering going over there to find out the truth. The value of the cards is hundreds of dollars. This is saying a lot since Will wants nothing to do with anyone over there. What is the truth? The fact does remain the box is missing and a whole afternoon of searching revealed nothing. Cade didn't take it with him to school. Will is still determined to hide all of this cards from now on. I have no idea what to do. Do I just let them deal with this? Connor had told three different stories. What bothers me the most is I am doubting him. Seeing him tailor a story to fit different people is too much like his dad in bipolar mode for me. Even if Connor doesn't have bipolar the fact he is copying the behavior scares me. Like Sean acting like a dry drunk. He didn't drink like his father but acted like him when his father was drunk. Dry bipolar maybe? Cade said Connor made up some decks with some of the cards and it is easy for me to see him wanting to get back into the game since it follows his pattern of reaching out in spurts. Wanting to see his old friends. Coming by for visits, feeling bad about selling everything, feeling the need to have money to pay people back for what he has "borrowed". With his regrets comes sadness and wanting to "be like he was before". I just don't know anymore.

All of this stuff is making me feel like a huge weight is on me. I need to get myself and Cade back to therapy ourselves soon but this past month was horrible. He was sick, then I was, then I had the root canal, now Sofie is sick. There isn't enough of me to go around. I had planned to go to town Tuesday but Sofie was coughing and I needed to go but she needed to be in bed and I didn't know what to do. I took a shower and cried. I just made a choice and neither option was a good one but I stayed home with Sofie. I still feel bad about it but there it is. Just thinking about this is making my head hurt. I guess I had better do something productive now.