Our Island Family Life

Lull at work now so I thought I would mention a few things I forgot. I was really emotionally wiped yesterday. I realized I had been out of the mood swing loop in a face to face way with Sean for a while. Seeing him turn off and on like that in person was troubling and darn it all I felt hurt and confused. You have that knee jerk feeling of wanting to defend yourself but talking to someone who is obviously angry and you KNOW has a history of mental issues it is best not to argue. I guess asking questions is a bad idea as well. What was stunning to me was to see him seethe and lash out at me verbally in the waiting room then turn on the charm and act calm and rational and reasonable when we sat in the counselor's office. I was struggling hard not to have tears fall from my eyes from shock and I am not sure I fooled anyone. I got the sympathetic looks and I was not at liberty to say, "It isn't because of the Connor situation it's because I just got verbally thrashed in your waiting room a few minutes ago." When I called the counselor back later in the day I should have mentioned it but I was already too frazzled and more focused on Connor and his needs than my own. Now I am kicking myself for not doing so earlier. Of course I was the one who looked like the "emotional" one and not Sean. How can people turn off and on like that? I am not all with it now either. I have the afternoon off but I will be cleaning my own place for a change and spending some time with Sofie and Cade. I really need to do that.