Our Island Family Life

I swear. I am never answering the phone during the daytime again if I see Sean's name on the caller ID. If it's when the boys are home, fine. Most likely he is calling for them anyway. I thought the hardest thing I would have to do today was defrost the freezer. I was going for a totally emotionally stress free day. No such luck. So, since I didn't answer the email he sent he decided to call instead. Two big things. One was about Connor. He wanted to know if I got his email. I said yes and didn't volunteer anything else. There is nothing to say. He asked if Connor was staying after today and tomorrow. I said no. He asked why. I said he didn't need to. He asked if all his work was made up and the whole idea if explaining to him about how certain teachers are only there certain days would have been over his head anyway. I said he was using his academic support block in school to take care of things and staying after wasn't necessary. He asked about the absent marks and I had to explain the scheduling snafu which made it look like he was out for one or two classes three days a week when he was there in a different class. Connor had already explained this to him before and here I was doing it again. He asked if Connor was coming over to see him this weekend and I told him Connor had planned on working this weekend so I doubted he would. He said, "This Friday?" I swallowed all my sarcastic responses and simply said yes. Then he said, "Well, I'll see Cade on Friday." Problem two. Now when the phone calls were going on between Cade and Sean last week over Halloween Cade had made the offer of switching weekends. That would mean he would be seeing his dad this coming weekend. Sean never answered Cade about it during their first talk at all. Sean also didn't say anything to me about agreeing to that when we talked during that same phone call. When Sean called back to tell Cade he could stay he never mentioned he expected to see Cade this weekend. He never said he was accepting Cade's offer. He never even said, have a good time see you next week. Nothing. When Cade hung up I asked him if his dad mentioned anything about this weekend and he said no. Sean never asked to speak to me and he hung up before I could ask. Cade did not think for one second he was going to have to go over there this weekend. Here is where I messed up. Another live and learn thing on how to make things are crystal clear with someone who is an expert of lies of omission and manipulation. I should have followed up and emailed Sean myself to check plans. I again made the mistake of trusting that Sean and one of his kids could come to a compromise neatly and clearly. Now I am going to have to clean up another emotional mess. I was taken by surprise obviously when Sean said that about Cade and I asked him what he meant. He told me, "We switched weekends." I told him I did not agree to that. What I had agreed to was for Cade to make the offer and that it needed to be worked out between them. I told him that when he called Cade last Sean did not talk to me directly about agreeing to a switch and that Cade has no idea that was what Sean was expecting. I told him he would have to talk with Cade tonight and settle things then tell me what their plan was after their conversation. In any case even if Cade agrees to come in for the weekend I would not be bringing him until Saturday. All my plans for Friday are postponed because we are supposed to be getting 45 mile an hour winds and the boat won't run in anything over 30mph. I might even keep the older boys home. Getting to town wouldn't be an issue but if the winds pick up then we wouldn't be able to get back. I haven't made an firm decision yet. I need to see the weather tonight first. Sean said ok about Saturday. I can tell in his mind it's already settled and Cade is coming. How am I going to have to break this to Cade? We had even made plans to go shopping on Saturday to Goodwill for pants and maybe find a new movie there. Do some window shopping for xmas. Maybe see a real honest to goodness movie with lunch. He is so looking forward to it. Now I will have to brace him to have to talk with his dad again. Another hard conversation. Tonight is going to be miserable. He was even talking about his dad today and it was not in a good way. Then of course there is Connor. I have to talk with him about his dad calling about his school. Connor is going to need to call him himself and tell him he isn't coming (or email) and explain his situation with his absences and make up work. Not what I wanted today.