Our Island Family Life

I finally contacted a human at DHHS today. Obviously there wasn't any money in my account. I had to call back twice which didn't make me feeling like things were going to go well. I had some maybe good news but mostly bad. I am thinking if things progress the way they have been I won't be getting any money until the 15th or 16th. This is what is happening. There is no bank release form they are waiting for from Sean. I figured that. What the hold up is that they have to wait 30 days to release money to me unless Sean writes them a letter stating he isn't going to ask for a hearing. What they are trying to do isn't a monthly attachment from any employer, since they haven't all the confirmations on that yet. Instead, in order to try and get me money sooner they are attaching his bank account. Since this is affecting him the law says he has 30 days to ask for a hearing. In order to keep his licence he agreed with the case worker that he wouldn't ask for a hearing and he would write up the letter and send it to them. Once they got it they can release money to me as soon as possible and there wouldn't need to be a 30 day wait. He KNEW about this on September 15th. That is when I last heard from the case worker. That is when the deal was brokered. At the time I was talking with the specialist I didn't think clearly but now that I have had time to reflect I feel sick again at Sean's callousness. He could have sent the letter in the next day and I could have had that money by now for the dentist and other things...like rent. He then sends me an email only last Friday to say it had only "just come to his attention" that he needed to "send in a form" and he "didn't know what the hold up" was? He KNEW, he knew. He lied and stalled and increased his debt and conned his way into keeping his licence. He SHOULD have lost it until we had the money. Also, the bank attachment is a one time thing that takes what is in his account..all of it. He has given himself time to clean it out and when the attachment hits on the 15th, with or without his letter, than all I will get for the kids is whatever he has in it. Then that's it. No monthly payments. It could be only a $1000 or $2 bucks for all I know. I was so frustrated. I asked them why this wasn't done. I told them I have been trying to get this for a year now. The court order for withholding is clear. Why aren't they DOING anything. I pointed out his disability was there at the time of the divorce so there shouldn't be any excuses of his unemployment. I asked if they had verified yet his work at the school. They hadn't. More frustration. I told them that Will's principal had seen him at an inter school event and I was sure he was working. I reminded them the school had 30 days to verify his employment or they were supposed to be fined. I was told they sent the letter out to the school on August 5th. So? FINE them then. Call them. Do SOMETHING. So the guy I was talking to was pretty upset and said this was DHHS's bread and butter and should have done something about this sooner. Choir here. He sent emails to the case worker about the school verification and about the email I told him Sean sent me telling me he faxed them his letter last Friday. If he did....IF then the money would be released Tuesday to them. They then will direct deposit it to me later in the week. Because of the holiday everything is behind. By then of course it will be around the 15th anyway. Then the guy asked me what car Sean had. I told him is was a Lexus but used. He said as long as it's newer than 10 years old they can put a lien on it. Sweet. Then he asked me if he owed property. I told him he had a house in Portland but I didn't know if he was on the deed or if it was just his current wife. God I hope they added his name on it after the divorce. I know they didn't add his before then because of that. If they did then there is another lien. He said they likely hood of getting money from it was slim but it would send a clear message to Sean they are after him and keep his attention and mess with his credit. I am to call back on Tuesday anyway to see if the money has come through and check the progress. I am going to have to call every week. On the plus side I have the name of the case worker now and I can ask for her directly. Everything has to be done through her anyway. This is just totally nuts. The system is failing. I am so tired of it.

On top of that last night I was telling Sofie she was going to see her grandparents on Friday and then see dad and she was very upset. I have something for Sean's parents and they have some clothes for Sofie so I asked if I could leave Sofie and Cade with them for a little visit and have Sean pick them up from there after I left. That was fine with them. Sofie was cool with that. She just didn't want to "go the the witch's house". Sofie then said, "Ragan hurt me. Dad didn't help me." I really..I mean REALLY didn't want to ask. Cade jumped in and said "the beast" was really mean last weekend. Sofie said that she had bitten Sofie. Crunched Sofie's finger real good. Then she talked Sofie into taking her clothes off. Cade had Sofie get dressed when he saw her and rounded on the girl asking her what in the heck did she think she was doing? Cade was really mad. She did other things too but those were to two biggies that freaked me out a little. What can I do? Talking to Sean doesn't work. Telling him these things are going on is also pointless because he knows. The kids tell him. He isn't ignorant. This is just not a good environment for them. I just don't know how to help them anymore. I can't just keep them home. I would be breaking the court order by doing so and by extension the law. I know some might see it as a "well you didn't pay the child support so you don't get the kids" thing when I don't feel that way at all. I am not one of those women. I am just worried and scared. *sigh*

I emailed Sean on Tuesday telling him where the kids would be Friday. He never responded. So, hopefully the kids will have a nice visit the whole weekend with their grandparents. We'll see.