Our Island Family Life

Connor just came home from his visit with his dad. Maybe it's just me. Maybe I am over reacting. In due consideration for that I am biting my tongue and saying nothing to Connor about something I really want to scream about. He showed me stuff he had picked up over the weekend. He borrowed a dvd. Purchased two new used cd's and borrowed a book. He said, "I have a self selected novel to read for school." He showed it to me. Self selected my ass. The book is his fathers and is by the author Yukio Mishima. I am not going to go in depth about this author but I instead put a link below for anyone not familiar with him to read. If Sean had given this to Will to read would I be so upset? No. Will is mentally stable. Connor? Well, he has issues. Let me say this, the writing is amazing. Beautiful prose. Intense ideas. I am against censorship so I would not say the books shouldn't be read. On the contrary, they instill many emotions and debate. Do I care about the author homosexual leanings? Nope. I could care less. Here is my problem. The author as a person and in his works dwells deeply on the "beauty of death". One should die young and beautiful. A preoccupation with the body as perfection before age makes it ugly. In his real life he killed himself committing seppuku (ritual disembowelment). He had hoped to write prose in his own blood but was unable to yet was still alive. His second tried to cut his head off but was not able to fully decapitate him so the third was finally able to complete the deed. The reality of death was not as nice as the romanticised version Mishima expected I am sure. There is the rub. I don't really want my 15 year old son who has once before told me he wished to no longer exist in the world to read something that glorifies and romanticises death.

I know Connor did not pick this book out for himself. I know his father gave it to him. Sean admires and raves about Mishima's work. Again, let me say that I also find his works moving and find much of it beautiful and challenging. I am an adult with no inclinations of wanting to kill myself and never have felt that way. With Connor's tendency to latch on to ideas and just tunnel vision them to the point of "how wonderful this is and if you don't like it you suck or are stupid". It worries me immensely. Sean is the same exact way. I looked at the book and handed it back and shook my head. Connor then tried to tell me everyone in Japan thought the way he did back then. He died in 1970 for goodness sake. Not to mention, what a blanket statement and I knew it was his fathers ideas pouring out of his mouth and not Connor's own thoughts. Regurgitated BS, and Sean wants to be a history teacher? I knew about the author before Sean did. I had frank discussions with him about his works many times and found Seans admiration almost disturbing. Do you give a suicidal girl Sylvia Plath and tell her to have fun? No. So don't go and give Connor Mishima. Bottom line here is knowing your own child. This is not good for him but I can think of other kids his age I would recommend it to. I can also think of other kids his age I would not recommend them to. Book to fit the person. If Sean wants to be death obsessed so be it. I would rather by child wasn't.

I will have to sit with Connor and discuss this with him but not tonight. I so wanted to talk about homosexuality, bushido, suicide, body image and internal verses external beauty this week. When the easiest topic to discuss is sex then you know your in for a bad day.