Our Island Family Life

I woke this morning with another migraine. Well, it woke me up and I took some medicine and crashed again. Then it was time to wake up since Sofie was awake but the pain was still there so I took some more medicine and since it is school vacation week (yippie!) I asked Will to get her breakfast and make sure she got dressed while I let the medicine take effect. I can not remember a recent time I have had to take two pills to make it go away. I was out for about another hour when I had to pee and the pain was tolerable so I figured I had better get up and make sure the kids were getting themselves together and not laying in a pile of their own filth. How they manage to create a mess in mere minutes just astounds me. Anyway, on the way to the bathroom I hear Connor and Cade talking about their dad. Cade said he didn't want to go visit his dad. Connor demanded to know why. Cade told him about the whole money issue from beginning to end and finishes saying, "Until he apologizes I'm not going." Connor then said Cade was exaggerating things and that Connor also doubted him! Then Connor went on to say, "Mom is twisting dad's words." Cade got angry and told him how dad was the one who flat out accused him of stealing then told him not to come on a visit. He told Connor I wasn't involved at all in that. Connor told him that Sofie and Cade were missing visits because of me and I was being unfair. Cade began raising his voice and told him dad had twice given up a chance to see them by his own choice not mom's. Then he asked Connor if he remembered when Connor was sick last and how Sofie and Cade also were sick. Connor said he remembered. Cade said that he stayed home, Sofie too because of that. Outside of those times he and Sofie haven't missed any visits. If dad was feeling so bad about not seeing them then why did he tell mom to "just take them home." Connor told Cade that was just what I had told him and dad wouldn't say that. Cade growled at him then said, "I was THERE. He said it in front of my face! Mom never told me anything." Then Cade went on about the money issue again and told Connor I had never told Cade that dad was accusing him of stealing. Their dad said so himself at the baylines. On top of that dad had questions for him he sent by email and how was mom able to twist that? It was written down. Then Cade said another reason he didn't want to go was because he knew when he gets there Kathryn will lecture him for at least an hour asking him why didn't he come and why did he do this or didn't do that. He just didn't want to deal with her when "frankly it's none of her business but between me and dad but dad will just let her shout and rag on me and do nothing to protect me from her mouth." Connor then agreed that that "would be annoying" but Cade was probably exaggerating how long the talk would be. Cade blew a fuse and said it wouldn't be a talk but a lecture from her and it didn't matter if it was a minute or 20 hours she had no right to say anything to him about it. Cade came downstairs not long after that. I didn't interrupt them and I have no guilt about eavesdropping. I was beside myself at Connor. One weekend with his dad and his mind is brainwashed. How could he lose faith in me so much as to think I would twist his fathers words around? After how much I tell them about honesty? Not to mention there is so much I just don't even talk about with them since it isn't appropriate. If Connor has an issue with me "twisting" things then why doesn't he tell me? He saw how easy it was for him to see his dad this weekend when they both got their acts together. He should see I am also not keeping him from his father. Anyway, I haven't talked to him. I did talk with Cade though. I told him I overheard a few things and if he was ok. He said he was. I asked him if anything Connor said hurt his feelings. He said he was hurt Connor doubted him but he felt that it wasn't really Connor talking. He said, "Connor just opened his mouth and dad came out. He will be himself again after a few days." I am not as optimistic. Another thing worrying me is Connor told Cade he was going to sell the playstation because he needs money. He is money obsessed lately. I already mentioned how he sold his xbox for money. The thing with the playstation is that does not belong to him. Is he going to try to start selling stuff that doesn't belong to him like his father? Are we going to start looking for dvd's and games or whatever and find them missing? Connor was going on and on yesterday about how he needs money and how he was going to look for work today and asked if he could babysit the boy I take care of. I told him he could since this would get him some money and free me up to go to the grocery store, do the spring cleaning and study for my midterm this Thursday. The store thing has to be on Tuesday because I can get the food shipped cheaper and I don't have to do the packing. I also need to get Cade's haircut. So he agreed he would call the mom when she gets home tonight around 7pm and see if and when she needs him. Ok, done deal right? Not with Connor. So a few minutes ago he comes in and tells me he is going to call his aunt and he has plans to see his dad (news to me) and then see his aunt tomorrow. I asked him about work. He said he can do it wed., thurs. and friday. I told him he needs to talk to the mom first and find out when she needs him then plan his free time besides I was planning on doing the food shopping tomorrow and he needs to be here to babysit the little boy. He said, "It's vacation. You mean to tell me I can't see my dad?" I sighed seeing where this was going. I told him he told me he made a commitment to work since he said he needed money so badly and because if that I made plans. I told him he had asked me if he could see his dad "sometime" over vacation but never told me anything specific. I was ok with that but in real life if you want to work and need money then you find out when you can work and plan around that. If he wants to work fine. If not, also fine. If he doesn't though I don't want to hear another word about him needing money, wanting money, asking to borrow money or find him selling anything that does not belong to him. I also did not want to hear one word from him about how we need food or why are we out of milk if I have to miss out on shopping day in order to work. I am sick and tired of hearing it. He said he hated this and how this always happens. He just wouldn't go because I was mad at him then he left. His all or nothing attitude. I am so glad he did. Is that bad of me? I still haven't talked to him about other things. I will call the mom myself tonight and see if and when I can work. I will go from there. If I have to miss shopping to work then so be it. It would be nice to get more milk but I have dry and I have no problem with what we have until next week. *sigh*

ok, now I have whiplash. Connor just came back and apologized. He said he was going to meet the boat to talk to the mom and that he was sorry he got so upset with me. Work should come first and if he had to work tomorrow he was sure once he had a schedule he work something out with his aunt and his dad. "It isn't like dad hasn't told me he couldn't see me because he had to work before. He will just have to accept I have work to do too. If we can work something out great. If not I'm sure I can see my friends or something."

!

So, I think I am just going to go pass out now.