Our Island Family Life

So, day three of the one week plan is still on track. Somewhat. Connor has made the boat two days in row and last Friday. It seems small to be viewing it this way but it really is best to do it one day at a time for now. I can see he is putting a lot of effort into making it to school and his work. That is about all the stress he is able to handle. When he gets home his mood is good but he has to have down time almost right away before he can even begin to think about helping out with chores. As it is he is already starting the, "I'll do it." Then it's too late and time for bed. We can NOT skimp on his sleep. Finding balance is going to be an on going struggle for him I think. I asked him to do three things yesterday, bring the folded laundry basket upstairs, put away the clean dishes and bring the trash barrels back from the road. He only brought the laundry upstairs. One thing is better than none. I am trying to not get upset about it. We need to focus on school right now. Yesterday he talked with his crew teacher and she said she would talk to his science teacher about being more responsive to his questions and to be more clear about any missed work. He gets pretty upset when he asks for the work and his only response is a finger pointing to the wall. He does what is there and feels proud then is told he isn't asking for the work and is behind. Then he gets upset. I don't want him feeling like it isn't worth even bothering about when he is trying and is shot down. He said he told her about his dad and he said he felt better about having her being a middle man for him and being in his corner. I told him I had spoken with the social worker and what she had said. I told him there would be a conference before we made any changes. We may not even need to. When I try and look at it in that perspective then him bailing out of a chore or two is on the lower end of the priority list for me. It's something on the back burner to discuss in a later therapy session. I know from Cade the need for down time is VERY important. Cade for example came back from his dad's this weekend and pretty much ignored us for a few hours and zoned out. His mood wasn't angry or unhappy. He just needed some time to himself. His dad didn't even come back on the boat with him but just sent him alone. At least I had a neighbor go with him on Friday when I couldn't be there. Monday morning though he was all in an uproar. He was banging things around and had a headache and was just on the verge of tears. He was saying he hates school and that I know is not true. He loves his school and teacher. I kept him home and we did all his work online with the help of his teacher who also has been there from the very beginning with this mess and knows Cade had trouble adjusting. Today he is back to himself and bounded out the door. When he found out next week he would have to stay an extra day (because of the holiday) he cried. I hope Sean sends them back on Sunday anyway. Most of the time he is pretty selfish about his time and would send them back but he is unpredictable.